chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize