the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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