i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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