Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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