it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
