i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
