Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
