how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
