hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
