I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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