it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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