My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize