Have you finally orgasmed yet?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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