I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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