I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
