yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
