cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
