No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
