Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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