I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
