i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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