she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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