That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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