It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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