Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize