im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize