we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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