im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
