is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
