I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Pappa wants mamma naked
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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