Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize