it wasn't lemon gatorade
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Found your dick twin last night
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
