i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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