Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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