dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
