I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
