Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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