so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
So much rum. So many feels.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize