i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
