Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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