ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize