Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
