Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
