sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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