let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
