i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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