new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
