She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
