Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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