I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
