Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
